He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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