YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
