dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
