I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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