But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
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