Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar