He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
