A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
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guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
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all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
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