Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
