Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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