Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Randomize
