speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
why do cheetos always look like penises
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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