But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize