I don't remember. Are we still dating?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
