remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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