he wants to bone in the snuggie
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Sorry about my life...
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
