I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.