some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize