some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Less talking, more tequila
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
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