Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize