If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I just gift wrapped bread.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Randomize
