I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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