Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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