i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
