operation have a gay friend backfired
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
