All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Randomize
