I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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