She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
