i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
