Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
