Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize