its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Walk of Shame today included voting.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
