Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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