Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
