My nipple is on Facebook.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
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