Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
it was like his penis was on wheels.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
