Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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