my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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