You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
