I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
