...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
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Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
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you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha