I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
