it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
you had me at cake vodka
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You're a waste of cheezeits
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Terrible idea I love it
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
