You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
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