In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
