Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
