They should really pass out barf bags in church
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
