I got chris browned last night
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
