Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
