your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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